I have Combined Type ADHD.
I've always known I was different - I thought I was just weird! I was pretty proud of my weirdness (I realized I spotted things others didn't) until I lost my self-confidence in early adulthood and feel I've only just got this back over the past year or so. When my son was diagnosed with ADHD in June 2025 (I'd always known he was different too) and I started to research more about neurodiversity, I started to spot signs in myself and decided to explore it so I could better help him and myself. I was diagnosed in December 2025 and everything is slowly starting to make sense.
I'm comfortable with neurodivergent. I am less confident with the word "disorder" - I'm not broken, I'm just not typical (and I quite like that). Dopamine Deficient would actually be most accurate (as that is what ADHD means).
Quite like slayDHD though...
At the risk of sounding like a stereotype, it's a mixture of feeling like I have a superpower and feeling like a fish out of water. I've struggled to fit in the past - I'm aware I can be perceived as annoying, rude or blunt. I'm actually just very excited about new ideas, individual potential and hate injustice. I am a natural problem-solver and I want everyone to be the best they can be, so if I spot something that is wrong I want to fix it. That means I call issues out - not everyone is comfortable with that. I can promise you that I would never want to upset anyone - I am only ever trying to make things better.
I remember a close friend getting really annoyed with me because she felt I kept interrupting her. I wasn't even aware that I did it and was devastated when she told me. I've tried really hard since then not to do this, but I do struggle. If I get hyped-up, it can genuinely be hard to not to speak. This is ually because you've said something exciting and have sparked an idea.
I'm brave and bold. I'm not scared of problems or confrontation - I'll work with you to fix them. I see the good in people and take immense pride in helping others to see the good in themselves. My brain sparks connections incredibly quickly and it often means I come up with ideas that haven't been thought of before. I can work very fast.
I talk to much and I can interrupt. I forget what I'm saying mid-sentence because I get distracted and will have lost my phone around 10 times before even getting to work. I'm the person who leaves their coat in the car or their water bottle in the meeting. I re-read emails multiple times before I send them and still don't notice mistakes until the next day.
I've found it best to be open with people and be self-aware. I try and catch myself if I interrupt and apologize. If anyone knows how I can stop losing things, please let me know!
Diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder in my early 20s, then Postnatal Depression and Anxiety, then Mixed Anxiety and Depression. Started to suspect I may be neurodivergent when I looked into having my son assessed and finally went to the GP when I remembered after his diagnosis! I went to a lot of parent education classes and realized the behaviors they were discussing where applicable to me. That's after neurodivergent friends told me "you've definitely got ADHD!" I chose the Right to Choose Pathway.
Parents were a little bit dismissive initially because I think they were in shock (it can't be nice to be told you've missed the signs in your child, and I appreciate that as a parent myself). Now they are doing their own research and can see it more. Some colleagues were surprised because I am "high functioning" and organized. Friends were like "duh!"
I am studying for an apprenticeship and for the first time in my life I asked for extra help. I have extra coaching to help me stay on track and avoid hyper focus, which has resulted in extreme anxiety in the past. I have always been self-reflective as an adult and now I am through an ADHD lens too. I am learning about my past so I can be happier in the future. I'm learning my strengths for the first time, rather than focusing on my weaknesses. I am understanding that I have a chemical imbalance (lack of dopamine) that can affect my behaviour and that's not my fault. Understanding the science of it means I can learn more about how to help myself, like starting the Keto diet (recommended by my very supportive line manager) to naturally boast dopamine.
Lists, but flexible ones like Trello. I don't get stressed if I can't do everything in a day as Trello is designed for fluid working. Coaching has been a massive help and generally being kind to myself. I am trying to listen to others when they give me praise and accept that I deserve it. I try to be aware of my Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD), focus on the facts and seek reassurance if I worry.
Any environment with people. I start to get depressed if I'm alone for too long. I learn through talking (as anyone who works with me will have experienced...) so brainstorms and inclusive, collaborative environments are where I thrive.
When people don't say what they mean. Just be specific. I don't need you to soften things. I worry less when you tell me straight (and I'll probably get buzzed-up finding solutions).
From secondary school onwards, I was an overachiever. This intensified throughout my education - I got 100% in most of my A Levels and have a First Class Degree. I love learning but hyper-focus and anxiety drove perfectionism and I burnt out. I was always the person in the library until midnight because I thought I'd fail. I was also the one who usually led projects as I was the loudest and appeared the most confident.
At secondary school, I was the class clown, particularly in subjects that I found boring. I was always being silly.
Coaching, kindness and being allowed to be myself.
Many neurodivergent people are bold, blunt and direct. This means they can be perceived as "difficult". This is rarely their intention - we just want to make things better for us all and the way we know how to do that is to call a spade a spade. People with ADHD like me can experience Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD) - it doesn't mean we can't take criticism (I like knowing how I can improve), but please choose your words carefully. If you say what you mean, I don't worry. If you are vague, I'll fill the gap and usually assume the worse. This causes a lot of anxiety.
I wish people understood that ADHD is a dopamine issue. My neurotransmitters don't worry in the way they should do. It's not a fade or a label, it's a medical condition.
I'm starting to get a good neuro-radar! I see neurodivergent traits in others easily.
We also run in packs. If you have a lot of neurodivergent friends, you may be one of us too!
That organized people can't have ADHD and kids that can't sit still or be quiet are naughty or disruptive.
That I am good enough, just as I am. Everyone is (unless you're mean!)
My biggest hope is that my son retains his specialness and his enormous imagination and creativity. I hope he doesn't get the wind knocked out of his sails like I did. I want him to be confident, happy and thrive, like I want every person to be.
Open discussions about how individuals see the world. Asking about communication preferences in management 1-2-1s. Maybe we could add this to pronouns? Seeing all people as indivdiuals, taking the time to understand them and not making assumptions.
Welcome to the club! Take your time, feel your feelings and go at your own pace. You'll go through grief as you look back on your past experiences but know that a bright future awaits. If you do decide to get assessed, look at Right to Choose through your GP and choose the shortest waiting list.